نمونه رایتینگ تافل با نمره‌ی wr67999

Topic: Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It is more enjoyable to have a job where you work only three days a week for long hours than to have a job where you work five days a week for shorter hours. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Some people prefer to have a job with three days a week for long hours. But others prefer to have shorter hours during five days a week. In my point of view It is more efficient to dedicate just three days of week to our job. By doing so we could provide sufficient concentration for our job on three days and also save extra two days only for ourselves. Also thinking about other off days could be an energetic factor during our job.


The most important reason is working only on three days a week and saving extra two days could be very helpful to provide extra pleasure time for you without any worries about the work issues. for instance I am going to to have a party and ask over my friends to come in. Because I have two extra day I easily can handle my party by a great planning and dividing my tasks between these extra days. It is not possible to manage a party on a day in which I had to work. Therefore I could increase relaxation time of mine.


Besides when we have to work only on three days, our duties automatically increase in the workday and it is a great factor to increase our concentration. As a result of which the performance will be improve. Let's take I am on a workday and based on rules I have to finish my daily duties. So I have a lot of things to do. In order to end all of my tasks I stop thinking about any other issue on the work. Indeed I speed up and also the output and quality would be in the best level. That is why working less days with longer hours could have a positive impact.


The least important reason is as for my experience some factors could be incentive when you are very busy and exhausted at work. Remembering you have four days off which are dedicated just to your family and you could be an effective incentive at work. On the other hand reminding you have to work on two more days could absolutely make you despondent and nervous during workdays.

To sum up you at first glance you have a job on three days with compact hours. But in fact you also have much more free time which could make you feel better and more energetic and excited to think about. What can make you more successful than a high spirit in your profession?


status score
Word Choice | انتخاب واژگان a noticeably inappropriate choice of words or word forms: (2 2
Organization and Development | توسعه دادن نوشته somewhat developed explanations, exemplifications, and/or details(3 3
Addressing Topic | بیان مسئله Addresses using somewhat developed explanations and details: (3 3
Unity, Progression and Coherence | یک پارچگی متن connection of ideas may be occasionally obscured(3 3
Grammar | ساختار های صحیح an accumulation of errors in sentence structure and/or usage(2 2
Vocabulary | املای صحیح inappropriate choice of words(2 2

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For and Against: L G Alexander
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شما هییییچ اعتقادی به استفاده از ساده ترین علامت نگارشی ینی کاما ندارید. حالا بقیه چیزها بماند! اینو حتما کار کنید. جاهایی که با قرمز اخرین حرف هایلایت شده اونجاهاییه که کاما نیاز داشته...
هیچ وقت مخاطبتون رو خواننده قرار ندید و you نگید همیشه از one , individual استفاده کنید
خیلی فارسی نوشته شده برید توی دیکشنری بگردید برای تمام لغت هایی که قرمز شده واژه مناسب تری پیدا کنید
ضمنا کتاب ها رو بخونید میبینید که حتی از but, and, a lot of و اینجور چیزای ساده هم باید کمتر استفاده کنید وقتی میشه خیلی قشنگ تر نوشت.
مثال هاتون هم که نگم دیگه. خیلییی بد نوشته شده. از اینکه از خواننده بخواید چیزی رو فرض کنه جدا بپرهیزید. مثلا اینجوری بگید: برای مثال، من اوایل کارم 5 روز در هفته بود نمیتونستم مهمونی بگیرم ولی بعدا تایمم کمتر شد با خیال راحت میتونستم هندل کنم.
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